The Song I Sing to You
by Lala Sharada
Summary: Life change happens, and boughs break unexpectedly. It's during the difficult times, when we're wading through the mire, that we sorely need someone to lean on. -Or Victor and Yuuri have sick twin babies.-


A.N: Hey, this is my first Viccturi story! I'm going through some stuff. Viccturi are my puppets. I picked out names for their children and this story was born. That's about it. This will most likely be a simple two-shot.

ENJOY!

Yuuri cradles his baby son to his chest.

Sachio cries. He is feverish, unhappy, and uncomfortable. Yuuri thinks he's probably tired, too. His little body is warm to the touch. Yuuri has already taken his temperature and changed his diaper, and he was glad to see that Sachios fever had not broken through the 100s.

Yet.

Sachio is fussy and his little body instinctively curls up against his father's chest. He whines, opening his lips slightly, and then he pitifully attempts to lift his head. His eyes are as wide as saucers when they meet Yuuri's concerned gaze. They are big, and watery, foggy with fever. At four months of age, his eyes only contain a hint of their newborn blue coloring. It's now mostly given way to a deep, amber brown, much like Yuuri's own eye color.

Sachio blinks, and Yuuri can't help but smile at him. Laying his head back down, the baby settles into his father's secure embrace.

Yuuri sighs and rubs his son's back. He feels the heat of fever on Sachio's bare skin, and he urgently begins praying that Sachio won't get another bad fever.

Just let him stay healthy this time. Please. They can't entirely afford another stay in the hospital.

"How are my boys doing?"

Yuuri startles, not realizing Victor has suddenly appeared beside him.

"Vic-Victor!"

"Shhh, my love. Don't wake the tired little one."

Yuuri looks down at Sachio to realize that the baby has now completely fallen asleep on his chest. If anything at all can be said about their son, is that he loves his sleep. He winks out faster than a speeding bullet can hit it's target.

"I'm glad he's sleeping," Yuuri sighs.

Victor nods in understanding and quietly hands Yuuri a bottle of formula.

He accepts the bottle, and looks up to marvel that in Victor's other hand he cradles another bleary eyed little baby, snuggled in the crook of his arm. Somehow, Victor is also holding on to a second bottle. Being a father of twins bestows upon one many previously undiscovered talents. Yuuri has already discovered plenty of his own.

"Aneko woke up?"

"Does she ever sleep?"

Yuuri chuckles at Victor's dry sarcasm. He knows full well about their daughter and her strange sleeping habits. The baby either slept in spurts throughout the day- but hardly ever took a solid, single hour nap -or she was exhausted and slept all night long without once waking up to eat. The latter happened once in a blue moon. The former was more of what the two weary fathers dealt with on a day to day basis.

Aneko was always hungry, though, so that was good.

Where Sachio loved his sleep, and had the ability to fall asleep any where, his twin sister loved her bottle and guzzled it down with gusto any time, any where.

Victor moves around the living room and sits down on the couch with his daughter. Facing Yuuri, who's sitting comfortably in the armchair, he begins to feed Aneko her bottle. Victor is ritualistic and familiar in his movements.

Put Aneko on crossed knee. Grab burp rag. Put bottle straight into mouth.

Aneko didn't necessarily allow room for error when it comes to her feeding time.

Yuuri looks back down at sleeping baby Sachio, and he takes comfort in watching his chest rise and fall with the time of his quiet breaths. Yuuri begins to count them.

He gets to twenty, and then thirty, finally reaching fifty, and then Yuuri breathes out his own long held sigh.

"Counting again?" Victor looks over, concern coloring his features.

"Yes. He's sick, and I'm worried."

"What was his temperature?"

"99.6."

Victor nods in understanding, absorbing this information.

Being the parents of twins was terrifyingly daunting.

Being the parents of twins born premature was another thing entirely.

They still hadn't actually picked out the babies names and were waiting for them to be born to decide. Yuuri and Victor wanted the birth to be a surprise, and they got that surprise six weeks earlier than expected.

Their surrogate, a kind, strong, and amazing woman, handled it all like a champ. Despite the fact that she underwent an emergency C-section, and then spent a week in the hospital recuperating after the birth, she became Yuuri and Victor's rock during that long, scary, and trying first week of fatherhood.

No one knew exactly why the twins had been born early. Nothing was wrong with their surrogate, or her health. She simply went in to see her doctor about some stomach pain she was having, and then an hour later, she called Yuuri and Victor from a hospital bed, and consequently told them they were going to be fathers within the next hour.

They'd dropped everything and rushed to the hospital in a panic when they got the call. Babies born six weeks early can have any numerous number of possible complications and/or serious trauma at birth or in the NICU. A lot of children might not even survive the birth at all. The two burgeoning fathers had no idea what to do. They'd done some research, sure, but even still- nothing could have prepared them for what they actually faced when they stepped foot into that hospital on the day their twins were born.

Through it all their surrogate was brave and kind and patient with them. She trusted the doctors and had faith everything would turn out okay in the end. Her quiet strength was a solid anchor for Yuuri and Victor. Yuuri honestly has no idea how in world he and his husband would have gotten through the twins first week stay in the NICU without her there.

In the end, her faith proved true, and after an emergency C-section and a four week stay in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, they were able to bring their children home after the twins finally gained enough weight to be released. Five pounds was the mark, and both infants reached their goal weight within mere days of each other in the NICU.

Only when the twins got home, did Yuuri and Victor finally have the time to name their daughter and son.

Aneko was named since she is the older sister by two full minutes. And Sachio, the more sickly of the two, they named him for how lucky he turned out to be.

"Hold on, darling. Papa needs to burp you."

Yuuri was drawn from his thoughts when Victor spoke to Aneko. He quietly watched his husband take the bottle out of her mouth, and move her up to his shoulder so he could burp her. She sputtered and whined, crying into Victor's shirt.

She was never happy when a bottle had to be taken away- even if it was only for a moment.

Victor is tender and sweet as he begins to croon softly to Aneko. He sings her a soft Russian lullaby, one Yuuri has now heard many times over the past four months. Aneko quiets down, but only a little. She is still hungry.

Yuuri gives off a deep sigh, trying to calm his anxieties over Sachio's health. His internal struggle doesn't go unnoticed by his husband.

"Yuuri, my love, what is it?"

"I'm just worried about Sachio. I hate it when he gets sick."

"I doubt that we'll have to go back to the hospital. You know this." Victor gets straight to the point.

"I know- it's just . . ."

"What, Yuuri?"

Tears sting at the corners of Yuuri's eyes, he can't stop them. His breath hitches and burns in his chest. He looks up at Victor, his face open and worn.

"Victor, I hated how helpless we felt while the twins were in the NICU. There was nothing we could do for them. At all. They were so helpless and tiny, and we had to go home every day without them. God, that was so hard. I don't want to deal with anything like that ever again."

Victor is taken aback by the sudden outburst of emotion, Yuuri can tell. His eyes are wide and his mouth is open like he wants to say something, but he doesn't know what.

With a stark realization, Yuuri realizes that he and Victor haven't actually discussed this yet. The twins had had such a turbulent, stressful, and terrifying start to their lives, that Yuuri and Victor both had ignored how they were feeling about becoming parents. Especially as parents of sickly infants. It was damn hard.

To Yuuri, it felt like diving off a cliff with only a tattered safety net to catch him.

He had no idea how Victor felt about it.

"I'm scared, Victor, I really am," Yuuri is trying not to sob, but it's hard to do that with a four-month-old sleeping soundly on his chest.

Victor springs- as gently as a father of two infants can spring up -into action. He puts Aneko down in her small, portable sleeping rocker, pacifying her by turning on the attachable mobile.

When Victor turns to get Sachio from Yuuri, he is already holding the baby out to him, ready to collapse in on himself.

Taking Sachio, Victor gives his son a kiss on the forehead and then puts him in the other small sleeping rocker next to Aneko's.

Finally turning back to Yuuri, he opens his arms, and with relief Yuuri gladly falls into them. No words are said. Yuuri just cries, and cries, finally releasing all the pent up emotion he's been harboring since the twins's birth.

Victor holds him throughout it all, rubbing his back and even shedding a few tears himself. He felt guilty and sad, too. In all the rush and thrill and fear of being a new parent, he'd neglected his husband. They'd both neglected each other and the other's needs. They'd completely forgotten to check in and offer each other support. It was a forgotten and passed over mark for the both of them.

"I'm sorry, Yuuri. I'm so sorry, my love."

"No, Victor, honey," Yuuri sniffles, "I'm sorry." Lifting his head, Yuuri reaches up with his hand and cups Victor's cheek. What passes between them is a single look of intense fear and terrible sadness and overwhelming guilt. Wide, wet brown eyes meet with teary and heartfelt teal, and in that one moment, Yuuri knows he is forgiven.

"I'm sorry, too," Victor hugs him back close to his chest. "I should have known you were struggling with all of this."

"We forgot to lean on each other."

Victor nods in agreement, "Yes, we did."

Yuuri grips onto Victor's shirt, the action practiced and automatic- without thinking. Victor responds in kind and settles into the embrace. His arms are wrapped around Yuuri completely and he will stay this way as long as Yuuri needs him to.

Both men shed their emotions, Yuuri weeping open and broken, while Victor wallows in tears.

They are tired, and spent, and rightfully scared.

Being a new parent is hard.

Being a new parent of twins is terrifying.

Being a new parent of twins born premature is another thing entirely.

. . . Victor sings Yuuri a Russian lullaby. It's the only thing his tired brain can come up with.

. . . Yuuri sighs deep and long, comforted. He doesn't let go of Victor until the song is finished.

A.N: This is where I leave you. For now. I'll probably write a follow-up/conclusion chapter to this. Don't you worry. It will be much more fluffier.

This part came out more as a stream of thought, and I just needed to get it out. Personally, I was an extremely premie baby. I do not have kids, but I guess I wanted to just write this up for some reason. Eh, I'm going through some stuff. At least you get Parental!Viccturi out of it! Yay!

-Name Meanings

-Aneko- Older sister

-Sachio- Fortunately born


End file.
